Okay, I'll admit it: I'm clueless. I went to undeveloped, poverty-stricken parts of Asia and had absolutely no idea what I was getting into. For anybody else who's heading to that neighborhood, here's some information you'll definitely need.

How do you get rid of a gecko in your hotel room?

• Put up a sign that says, "Everybody with no eyelids has to leave."
• Stand outside your hotel room door and pretend you're a mealworm.
• Point your blow-dryer at them. Geckos hate having their hair messed up.
• Tempt it away with a female gecko and a tiny picnic table.
• Ask the desk clerk if you can borrow a mongoose.