| Colin | Chet | |
|---|---|---|
| Any big breaks from dad's friends | Appeared in "Band of Brothers," executive-produced by Steven Spielberg and dad. | Appeared in "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull," directed by Spielberg. |
| His famous relative noted on IMDB? | Nope. | Their top trivia item: "Nephew of Jim Hanks." |
| Weird moniker? | Not if your dad's name is Cecil. | No, it's pretty straightforward. It's "H to the E, and in between an aze." |
| Charity dealings? | Selflessly raised $90,000 to make a documentary about Tower Records. | Once tweeted, "No One Ever Got Anything In This Life By Waiting Around For Handouts." |
| A man of mystery? | A college graduate and friend of Jack Black. | Pensively asked, "Why arent there ... many tv shows about great artists, philosophy, legendary acts of history, spirituality?" but also pondered, "Sometimes I eat filet mignon. Other times I eat a big Mac. But u know what.... Either way I'm eatin." |
| Credibility problems? | Went to a college that's 2% black. | A theater major at Northwestern University, he went on to appear in a movie based on the Bratz dolls. |
| Loves women? | Married in 2010. | Once declared, "I'm straight lmao ok ThankYou,” and frequently tweets shirtless photos addressed to the "ladies." |
| Sports fan? | Loves the San Francisco Giants, Sacramento Kings, and San Jose Sharks. | Raps that his “balls served more than Serena playing tennis.” |
| Scandals? | Will appear as himself on "Happy Endings." | Allegedly called a hater a "faggot," probably on an iPhone purchased by dad's salary from "Bosom Buddies." |
| Musical talent? | Once played in a band called "Pontius Pilot" while claiming he didn't understand the name. | No. |
We know, we know: it's not even close. The winner is CHET HAZE! Meanwhile, this one is strictly for the ladies.
