Friday, 30 August 2013
Random Thoughts
I didn't. I woke up at 4 a.m. lightly bathed in sweat. I don't particularly mind sweating in bed, except I was alone.
Not helping matters was the bedding. It was dark and the covers were mangled and somehow the tiny top sheet had gotten swallowed up by the thick duvet. My options seemed like either arctic provisions or a naked man laying atop a mattress. While I enjoy the odd naked man, I also know that after laying prone for a period of time, his body partially liquifies and forms folds and wrinkles that rival the Grand Canyon if it had curly brown hair springing out of its chasms. Not to mention the whole Tennessee Williams stigma that comes with oppressive heat and sleeping:
STELLA: Oh, Brick. This heat is like a vice, squeezing the living daylights out of me. The dank air is settlin' in my lungs so it's like I'm a'wallowin' and a'frettin' in the soggy recesses of a swamp rather than at the luxurious Hyatt at the Bellevue. BRICK: I can't take it, Stella! It's circling my head like a buzzard and squeezing me like a snake and I swear it's going to suck me dry. Every breath I take my mouth turns to sand, and I can't move without feeling the accursed vines of the kudzu plant creeping up my thick, tattooed legs here on the edge of the upscale Rittenhouse Square shopping district.
I'm not the kind of person who accepts something and lets it go, especially if it means paying big bucks to not sleep for eight hours. I'm definitely a "bee in my bonnet" kind of guy, except I own the Bonnet Store. I hit a button on the phone that said "GUEST REQUESTS." I wasn't sure it was appropriate: it sounded like it was for people who ran out of hair gel rather than, say, people who had reached medium-rare, or didn't like lions clawing down their doors.
I explained the situation to the woman. She offered to send up an engineer to fix the thing, but in my book putting on clothes and having company pretty much means sleep time is done. Instead I went with her helpful tips: first, set the fan on AUTO instead of HIGH. I assumed that something running constantly at top speed was more efficient than something that randomly turned on and off, but I've never been paid to think at 4 a.m. Second, set the desired temperature at 68 instead of 60. I may have missed the logic here, but apparently if the air conditioner thinks the job is too big, it won't even give it a try. When the desired temperature is close to room temperature, it feels like it's got a fighting chance.
She also offered to send up a fan. I got the idea that if she worked at Avis and my Mercedes broke down, I'd be tooling around Philly on a Big Wheel.
I decided to go with her helpful tips. Twenty minutes later, when I realized the temperature wasn't going to change and I wasn't going to sleep, I called back and asked for the engineer.
I completely banished any thoughts of a silver lining when he arrived and wasn't even remotely hunky. He confirmed that the GUEST REQUEST tips were total crap while he pulled the AC filter out. He actually thought I'd be interested to know that it was two inches thick with lint, and I waited while he fetched a new one. "It'll be okay now!" he said. Really? I thought. Is that the Hyatt motto? If I find a hair on the Grilled Skuna Bay Salmon at the XIX restaurant will the waiter pluck it off and proclaim, "Looks like it's okay now!"
Needless to say, I was a bit grumpy when I boarded the MegaBus home. The guy behind me talking nonstop on his cellphone certainly didn't help. In his fourteenth conversation his voice suspiciously lowered, clearly indicating a female on the other end.
"Nickname?" he asked in Barry White's voice. "You gave me a nickname?" He chuckled long and low and I actually started to think it was sweet. "Yeah," he said, "I like that nickname. We'll have to give you a nickname too." Another pause while my chilly heart defrosted. I felt like recommending the standards: Sweetie, Darling, Honeybunch. "Okay," he finally said. "We'll call you Downstairs Margo."
I sighed. New York City's skyline appeared in the distance and I thought, "Well, it looks like I'm okay now."
Thursday, 29 August 2013
News Roundup (Linda Ronstadt, Adam Cooke, Pat Hewitt)
Local
World
Blast from the Past
- 2009: Videos - Rick and the Krickets@Stoney Creek Legion & Crazy Clover
- 2010: Vidoes - Jordan John and the Blues Angels@Artword
- 2011: Videos - Andre & the J-Tones@Porquois Festival
- 2012: News Roundup (Saddest Songs, Videos by Michael Keys, Lianne Cranfield, more)
Featured Videos
Links: Adam Cooke, Video courtesy of Adam Cooke, More Paul Simon Covers/Stories
Links: Pat Hewitt, Video courtesy of The Sociable One
Previous (Freedom Train & Dave Rave@Waterdown Ribfest) - - - Next (Videos: Crowbar@Brantford Canada Day)
Wednesday, 28 August 2013
Videos: Freedom Train and Dave Rave@Oh! Canada Waterdown Ribfest (June 29, 2013)
More Roy Orbison covers/stories
Blast From the Past: Videos- Freedom Train@Lesley's
Links: Freedom Train - More Freedom Train Stories, Dave Rave, More Dave Rave Stories, More Teenage Head Stories/Covers
Previous (Michael J Birthelmer's Zazibar & Your Number on CD) - - - Next (News Roundup with Jaclyn Kenyon, Linda Ronstadt, Adam Cooke, Pat Hewitt)
Tuesday, 27 August 2013
Michael J. Birthelmer's Zanzibar & Your Number Now on CD
Zanibar has a wonderful tropical feel throughout most of the disc. This isn't your typical island dance music but an amazing fun sound with its roots in folk. The storytelling is just superb.
Michael is backed up dutifully by Bob Doidge, Ed Roth, Bill Dillon, Brian Griffith and others. The background vocals by Ian Thomas, Dave Rave, and Jude Johnson are a real treat as well.
Video below courtesy of Ohanakamakame
Your Number is a fabulous musical voyage featuring different elements such as jazz, pop, oriental sounds, psychedelic passages, and synthesizers.The songwriting is top notch here as well.
Michael co-horts this time out include Carl Horton, Michael Hickey & Paul Panchezak (of Trickbag), and many others.
To get one (or both) of these stunning CDs, you can contact Michael through his web site.
The video below is a song from the CD.
Blast from the Past: Videos-Michael Birthelmer@Pine Street
Links: Michael Birthelmer, More Michael Birthelmer Stories, More CD Releases
Previous (John McKinley Recieves Mel Brown Award) - - - Next (Freedom Train & Dave Rave@Waterdown Ribfest)
Sunday, 25 August 2013
John McKinley Receives Mel Brown Award
John is a veteran performer who has worked as a sought-after session player and an inspirational teacher. He has encouraged countless young musicians in their artistry. His successful students include Matt Weidinger, Conor Gains, Alex Tintinelli, and many others.
The distinction is named after the late blues legend Mel Brown, who called Kitchener home. It's given to individuals who make significant contribution to the local blues scene. John definitely sets a great example.
Previous winners include Jackie Washington, Steve Strongman, Cheryl Lescom, Shawn Kellerman, Jimmy Vaughan, Bobby "Blue" Bland and others.
Click here for the Kitchener record story.
The video below courtesy of Rebecca Rayless
The video below courtesy of John McKinley Band
Link: John McKinley
Previous (James Anthony Inducted into Blues Hall of Fame) Next (Michael J Birthelmer's Zazibar & Your Number on CD)
Saturday, 24 August 2013
James Anthony Inducted as Master Blues Artist in Blues Hall of Fame
He was awarded the honour on September 22, 2013 along with frequent Jack de Keyzer collaborator Harmonica Shah, Alberta Adams, Blues photographer Don McGhee, and many others.
The event took place in Clinton Township, Michigan, where James performed along with the other talented recipients.
On his Facebook page he stated "Huge Honour thanks to all my supporters and friends!"
Other amazing Canadian Blues talent who've been recognized by the Hall include Derek Miller, Donnie & Hock Walsh (Downchild), Danny Marks, Colin Linden, Ken Whiteley, Morgan Davis, Danny Brooks, and more.
Video below courtesy of 241156can
Blast from the Past: James Anthony CD - On The Edge
Links: James Anthony, More James Anthony Stories
Previous (News Roundup w/Neil Young, Richie Havens, Ever-Lovin' Jug Band, Barlow, Relics) - - - Next (John McKinley Recieves Mel Brown Award)
Thursday, 22 August 2013
News Roundup (Neil Young, Richie Havens, Relics, Barlow, Ever-Lovin' Jug Band)
- Neil Young pulls out of Harvest Picnic
- Harvest Picnic story in No Depression magazine
- Rick from Rick and the Krickets is now in Rick and the 3d's
World
Blasts From the Past
- 2009: Videos-Trickbag@Cactus Festival
- 2010: Videos-Wright-Patterson Refugees@This Ain't Hollywood
- 2011: Videos-America@Festival of Friends
- 2012: Videos-Kitchener Blues Festival
Featured videos
Links: Ever-Lovin' Jug Band, Video courtesy of JP Magic
Links: Relics, Video courtesy of LutePlayer111
Links: Barlow, Video courtesy of CoalitionTalent
Previous (Videos: Mike Woods@Waterdown Ribfest) - - - Next (James Anthony Inducted into Blues Hall of Fame)
News Roundup
Cassidy was stopped early Wednesday about 10 miles south of Albany. Tests showed his blood-alcohol content at 0.10.
The Albany Times Union reported that when the arresting officer, Tom Jones, told Cassidy his name, the singer said, "What's new, pussycat?"
I mean, come on. When a dog dies, does it become a chicken? Does a monkey become a sea cucumber? No! Christ, we're intelligent people, not Buddhists! It's scientifically impossible. One thing does not turn into another! When you die, you become invisible and your soul floats up to heaven but suddenly sprouting wings and magically learning how to play the harp is just patently ridiculous.
I realize I need to be patient. I've been asking God to grant me patience almost every time I feel like hitting one of the kids. And I know it's comforting thinking that after God takes us, we'll all be flying around heaven like Superman. But the sad fact is that's just a sad delusion, and as much as it pains me to say this, we need to face the cold, hard facts. We'll have to walk around on the clouds just like regular old dead people.
Of course, these clouds also have a silver lining. God likes us better than angels. That's why he gave us free will while making the angels his helpers, henchmen, and housekeepers. Yes, we make mistakes, but He gave us that freedom because he loves us so much. The angels are second-class, not as good, sad substitutes for the real thing -- pretty much like God's adoptive children. He can cast them out of heaven, but once we're in we're good. It's like heaven has a union.
Anyway, if you agree, please spread the word. Next time one of your relatives dies and a well-meaning "friend" says God must have needed another angel, politely inform them that you're strong and resilient enough to face facts: that your dead relative will be sitting at God's right hand for the rest of eternity as long as idiots like them don't get in the way.
Tuesday, 20 August 2013
Gorgeous Portraits Capture The Feminine Side of Masculinity (PHOTOS)
Nir Arieli's portrait series "Men" places men in traditionally feminine spaces and postures, illuminating the human characteristics that have, over time, become decidedly feminine traits. The following male muses are making us wish men felt free to explore their feminine sides more often.
You'll notice a lot of these models are lying down. Men don't do that a lot, because they don't have to wait for themselves to come home from work.
Can't wait 'til Ms. Arieli captures women in traditionally masculine spaces and postures, but I guess there aren't many betting parlors left and there's like zero female models willing to kick a dog. Thanks, Huffington Post!
Monday, 19 August 2013
Quails in the Nest Debut Album: Live at the Cottonwood Mansion
This is indie pop folk at its best! Mikey Molnar's spirited voice and energetic guitar work rip through 7 remarkable tracks. Nicholas Valerio's drumming is of the same caliber. The infectious harmonica playing is also superb.
Per the title, this is an off the floor recording from the Cottonwood Mansion in Selkirk, Ontario. The result is an organic feeling performance with a homey feel.
This quality album can be downloaded through bandcamp, itunes, and emusic.
Below are two videos from the recording.
Links: Quails in the Nest, More Quails in the Nest Stories, More CD Releases
Previous (News Roundup w/Sebastian Paige, D'arcy Wickham & Graydon James) - - - Next (Videos: Mike Woods@Waterdown Ribfest)
Today in the New York Times: "Dark and Angry" Teenager Asks Mom To Join Him On Royal Caribbean Cruise
He wasn’t just an ordinary teenager who rolled his eyes and walked 10 paces ahead of me, either. He had grown into someone dark and angry, and when I was with him, I either felt like I was isolated in a psychological freezer or needed to hide in a bunker. He had called me unthinkable names and shattered my heart to smithereens. When he asked me to go on the cruise,
Friday, 16 August 2013
How To Tell If Someone Is Lying
They Speak Formally. Bill Clinton said "I did not have sexual relations" instead of the more familiar contraction "I didn't have...". This is typical of people who are lying; to avoid contractions and use more formal language to distance themselves from the lie.
I'd never heard of this rule until a Headline News anchor confirmed it on TV, again citing Bill Clinton as the gold standard of liars. I don't know how that man ever fooled us with his ridiculously stilted words! I feel like an idiot, being duped with so many tall tales, but with this handy rule I know it won't happen again. In the future I'll be on the lookout for truthtellers using honest words like these:
- Houston, we've a problem.
- We're the world.
- We'll fight on the beaches.
- We're not amused.
- I'll return.
- We're legion.
- I'm Spartacus.
- I've a dream.
- I'm the greatest.
- Don't judge, or you too'll be judged.
- The only thing we've to fear is fear itself.
- I'm what I'm.
- Thou shan't kill.
Thursday, 15 August 2013
News Roundup (Sebastian Paige, D'Arcy Wickham, Graydon James)
Blasts from the Past
- 2009: Memories of Jackie Washington Workshop@Festival of Friends
- 2010: Looney Tunes Workshop@Festival of Friends
- 2011: Dharlings & Friends@Simcoe Friendship Festival
- 2012: Paul Langille, Wendell ferguson and Katherine Wheatley@Private Function
Links: Sebastian Paige, More Sebastian Paige Stories, video courtesy of Monson89
Links: D'arcy Wickham, More Darcy Wickham Stories, Video courtesy of D'arcy Wickham
Links: Graydon James, Video courtesy of Savoury and Sweet
Previous (Brantford Open Stage, Part 3) - - - Next (New Quails in the Nest CD)
I don't know why nobody's thought of this before. If you want to build a massive structure, what building material makes the most sense? Wood means chopping down trees. Cement means digging up land. What we need is something that's environmentally-friendly and sustainable, with a supply will never run low.
Hey, how about human bodies?
There's certainly no shortage of human bodies, which is why the Great Cross is such a terrific idea. It'll be length of ten football fields, and eighteen stories tall. It'll be "the largest Christian monument in the world dedicated to Jesus Christ" (are there bigger Christian monuments dedicated to, say, Fozzy Bear?) and will be "easily" visible from space.
And it's going to be a stack of dead Christians.
The Great Cross Alliance is dedicated to constructing the largest, longest-lasting Christian monument in the world. It will be built of columbarium and mausoleum vaults that are available for purchase for you and your family. The Great Cross will be supported by a world-wide community who choose to become part of this beautiful vision dedicated to Jesus Christ.
Naturally the people who propose this massive project have also written the world's longest FAQ. It answers questions like:
- May I Visit? (Answer: Yes!)
- Will Participants Be Identified? (Answer: Yes! We'll glue "Hello! My Name Is" stickers to their feet. Psych! Ever hear of headstones, people?)
- Can I Donate To Help Build The Great Cross? (Answer: No, sorry. Psych! Send us a check.), and
- Where Did The Idea Come From?
The husband and father of the family that developed the concept had three similar dreams between 2007 and 2009. He saw an enormous, gleaming monument in the shape of a cross. The construction was a stack of large, clear glass blocks, each containing the perfectly preserved body of a person in peaceful repose.... [He] realized that such a monument could be a rallying symbol for worldwide Christianity, and a way to preserve the Word of God for a long time.
Got that? It was a vision. Jesus came to him and said, "Look! Stacks of dead Christians encased in glass as a monument to me!" And the guy replied, "Jesus, glass just does not make sense."
Where's the giant cross going to be? I found this map helpful:
Got that? NOWHERE NEAR CHINA. And how is construction coming? Well, see for yourself:
Wait. No, that's right. For a second I thought I got the construction photo mixed up with pictures of my third husband installing our eight-man hot tub.
Despite their divine inspiration, great ideas don't have such a great success rate. The Firearms Museum and Reflecting Pool still haven't been built at The Citadel. In fact, all they've got to show after nine months of fundraising is a wooden shed, but Porta-Potties are on the horizon. Unlike the dead folks who'll make up the Great Cross, its future isn't set in faux-stone.
IMPORTANT INFORMATION: The project must reach a critical level of funding before construction can begin. This level is set at the sale of 400 spaces.... Once the critical number of 400 is reached, construction will begin as soon as possible.
Did you see that? I just caught it out of the corner of my eye, but it looked like THE RED FLAG YOU CAN EASILY SEE FROM SPACE.
Mausoleum spaces at the Giant Cross are priced at $25,000 for a single casket. Four hundred of these would bring the builders ten million dollars. When it's finished, the cross "will enclose a volume of 8.6 million cubic meters," which is enough to "contain more than three Great Pyramids," but those first four hundred coffins will total only around 1,300 cubic feet. That's about the size of an eleven-foot cube, discounting the visitor's center or rainbow-refracting observatory dome they might prop on top. Initially, at least, that Christian monument you'll be able to see from space would fit into somebody's dorm room and there'd still be room for a dozen bongs and a "Hang In There, Baby!" poster. You'd drive out to the desert to look at it but it'd be totally be hidden by the World's Biggest Thermometer.
Will it be popular? Beats me. Maybe there are Christians who want to spend eternity piled up with other Christians eighty miles from Reno. But I definitely think it'll be a beacon of hope and source of inspiration to the entire world. I know every time I'll think of that mound of dead people who fall for crazy shit like this I'll say to myself, "Now that is a really good start."
(Via the very busy Joe.My.God)
Wednesday, 14 August 2013
Videos: Brantford Open Stage@Brant Park Inn (June 21, 2013) Part 3
Links: Mark McNeil, More Mark McNeil Stories
Links: Ian Reid, More Ian Reid Stories
Links: More Michael Hogg Stories, More John Harris Stories
Link: More Diane Kennedy Stories
More From This Show: Part 1, Part 2
Click here for the Brantford Open Stage web page. The new season will start on Friday, September 13, 2013. See you there.
Previous (Brantford Open Stage, Part 2) - - - Next (News Roundup w/Sebastian Paige, D'arcy Wickham & Graydon James)
"Make the most of your leftover Halloween goodies with these candy dessert recipes," one helpful website says before offering tips on how to turn those discarded peanut butter cups into a pie. Yeah, because we've all seen peanut butter cups and thought, "What the fuck am I going to do with these?"
Even Better Homes & Gardens -- what is with that name? Did you ever go to somebody's garden and think, "Wow, this is definitely better."? -- gets into the "leftover Halloween candy" act. Am I totally out of it here? I trick-or-treated for probably twelve years, most of those in my thirties, and I never had "leftover" candy. It's not like a Heath bar will go bad by Friday. If mold could grow on a Hershey bar they couldn't spend six generations in the candy machine of your local hardware store.
If you've got twelve M&Ms you need to get rid of, though, BH&G's Spiced Mice recipe is perfect for you. It also requires chow mein noodles, which makes me grateful that my folks never took me trick-or-treating in Beijing.
This Witch's Hat uses all your leftover popcorn. My second husband worked at a movie theater and we never had leftover popcorn. It has sweet and salty flavors, though, which will totally win your kids over if they're having their periods.
Still, there's an exception to every rule. The small effeminate part of me that loves Easy Bake Ovens and Hello Kitty totally crapped his pants when he saw this.
Looks adorable, but c'mon: chocolate bars, M&Ms, and cookies? Really? It doesn't take a genius to come up with the treat I'm giving away on Halloween:
Is it as cute? Not quite. But is it nutritious? Does a bear shit in the woods?
Tuesday, 13 August 2013
Videos: Brantford Open Stage@Brant Park Inn (June 21, 2013) Part 2
Paul Young with Jericho
Links: Jericho, More Jericho Stories, More Jay Linden covers/stories
Links: David Lum, More David Lum Stories
Links: More Al Lindsay Stories, More Doug Welland Stories
Click here for the Brantford Open Stage web page. The new season will start on Friday, September 13, 2013. See you there.
Previous (Brantford Open Stage, Part 1) - - - Next (Brantford Open Stage, Part 3)
Yesterday North Carolina Gov. Pat McCrory signed a law that requires voter to have photo ID. When asked why he backed this legislation despite the fact that voter fraud seems to be quite rare, he replied, "Just because you haven’t been robbed doesn’t mean you shouldn’t lock your doors at night."
I don't mind the allegory -- voter fraud equals burglary -- but guv must know there's only been one suspected fraud case in North Carolina in the last twelve years. Clearly it's more truthful to say, "Just because only one dude has been robbed in North Carolina in the last twelve years doesn't mean you shouldn't lock your doors at night." Because, you know, it kind of does.
Monday, 12 August 2013
Videos: Brantford Open Stage@Brant Park Inn (June 21, 2013) Part 1
Links: Donald McGeoch, More Don McGeoch Stories
Links: John and Sheila Ludgate, More John and Sheila Stories, More Ray Materick covers/stories
Rob Badger & Zenon Holdalyk
Link: More Bob Martin stories
More video to come . . .
Click for the Brantford Open Stage web page. The new season will start on Friday, September 13, 2013. See you there.
Previous (New Lucas Stagg CD) - - - Next (Brantford Open Stage, Part 2)
Imagine what would have happened if these two men had met! Let's let our imaginations run wild as we picture the pair sharing frothy cappuccinos at a Parisian cafe on a sunny afternoon in 1872.
MENDEL: Well, Charles, it has happened. We have stolen the very lightning from the Gods! I discovered how dominant traits are passed down from one generation to the next, and you showed how that gene transmission can change the whole face of a species. Together, who knows where these monumental discoveries will lead us! DARWIN: Gregor, you are right. The secrets of the universe have been revealed and now mankind's dominion over creation approaches the infinite. While remaining wary of the consequences should mankind try to supplant nature, what triumph do you most yearn for most? MENDEL: Ah, I don't want to sound like a dreamer, but I do have one fond wish. If we truly have mastered the minutiae of existence and can pull the tangled strings of life like some sidewalk puppeteer, I believe our path is clear. DARWIN: (LAUGHS) Yes, my esteemed colleague, I feel similarly. Tell me what you propose. MENDEL: I would like a fluffy little dog I can fit in my handbag. DARWIN: (NODS) Yes, that would be a milestone that would cement the reputation of even the greenest geneticist. But do you believe a trophy of this magnitude is even imaginable? MENDEL: Perhaps not. But we are on the right path! I shouldn't say this, because my research is not yet complete, but six weeks ago I crossed a healthy poodle with an allergic poodle in the hopes of creating -- no, I dare not tempt the fates! DARWIN: But I have guessed: will your new creation be called a PooPooPaChoo? MENDEL: If it's fluffy and it sneezes, I will totally shit my pants. DARWIN: Well, dear friend, that would truly be an accomplishment. The bill comes, and DARWIN pulls out his wallet. As he opens it, something very fluffy and small leaps out. MENDEL can't believe his eyes as he enumerates four tiny legs, a head and a tail. Can this snow-white scrap of nothing actually be related to the lumbering beasts that live to kill rabbits and other vermin? The bit of fluff with teddy bear ears and big blue eyes scurries across the table. It nibbles at a croissant crumb and then, sated, curls up on a Splenda packet like it's an oversized pillow. MENDEL: OHMIGOD! OHMIGOD, Charles, you have done it! It's breathtaking! It's spectacular! I would cut my heart out of my chest with an oyster fork to see it in tiny shoes. Why ever didn't you tell me? DARWIN: (HEAVING A BORED SIGH) What? Oh, you mean little Chutney? Why, I've had her since she was small.
Saturday, 10 August 2013
New Lucas Stagg CD: Good Things
Lucas's expressive voice works extremely well with lively numbers such as She's a Ghost and What I Mean or delicate songs like Good Things and One in the Same. Each and every track is accompanied by his band's five-star instrumental work.
Lucas is capably backed up by multi-instrumentalist Paul Macleod (ex-Skydiggers) with Jim Wolfe on keyboards and Adam Buschlen on Ukulele Bass.
This outstanding album can be bought at his live shows or though Busted Flat Records (CD or download). It can also be downloaded through cdbaby or itunes.
Videos below courtesy of Lucas's YouTube page.
Blast from the Past: Lucas Stagg and others on the Ensemble TV show
Links: Lucas Stagg, More Lucas Stagg Stories, More CD Releases
Previous (News Roundup w Ryan Van Sickle, James Gray, JJ Cale, Dave Rave) - - - Next (Videos from Brantford Open Stage)
Thursday, 8 August 2013
News Roundup (Van Sickle, James Gray, JJ Cale, Dave Rave)
Local
Canada
World
- Passings: George Duke, JJ Cale
Blasts from the Past
- 2009: Videos - Jack de Keyzer@Boston Manor
- 2010: Kenny MacInnis Videos
- 2011: Dave Rave@Dr. Disc Rooftop
- 2012: Andrew Kerth YouTube Videos
Featured Videos
Links: Wendy Lynn Snider, Video courtesy of Wendy's YouTube Page
Links: Monkley Cascade, Video courtesy of the band's YouTube page
Dave Rave: "Still Shankin'" from Dante Media Group on Vimeo.
Links: Dave Rave, More Dave Rave Stories
Previous (Patrick Lawton & Mark Vanderheyden@Rolly's) - - - Next (New Lucas Stagg CD)
And Now A Word From Our Sponsor
Droopy Sweater is a bold new innovation in fashion. After they're knitted from the finest Argentinian yarn, Droopy Sweaters are hung on wire coat hangers and left in a barn in Lancaster, PA. There we let gravity take its course. Two years later, when the yarn has loosened and the two front flaps are dangling like dead leaves in a Tuscan vineyard, they're shipped to fine retailers near you.
Crystal Young was 45 years old and had never contemplated buying new sweaters. But one day at the gym the pretty receptionist looked at her Donna Karan separates and thought, "Those are just too young and perky. It's like I'm ashamed of my droopy things."
"I'm 45," says Ileana Rodriguez, a Southern California housewife with four children. "I used to wear mini-skirts, and now I wear pants. I used to wear stilettos, and now I wear Easy Spirits. My body is changing, and it's time my sweaters changed too."
We know you'll love Droopy Sweater so much we're offering a 100% money-back guarantee. You'll smile as the loose-hanging flaps dangle between your legs. You'll chuckle when your pendulous protruberances gaily swing as you walk. You'll laugh out loud when the wind picks up and those wacky wings flutter and flash like windchimes.
You wouldn't wear a sweater that was made for men. So why wear one that was made for a girl? "I just love Droopy Sweater," says Rebecca Arlington, a 47-year-old ad executive. "People see my peach Droopy flapping out of the corner of their eyes and everybody turns to look. I smile, bold as brass. 'Yeah,' I say, 'It's Droopy. And I love it!"
Tuesday, 6 August 2013
Videos: Patrick Lawton, Mark Vanderheyden and Friends@Rolly Rockets (June 15, 2013)
Links: Mark Vanderheyden, More Mark Vanderheyden stories, More John Lee Hooker Covers/Stories
More Waylon Jennings Covers/Stories
More Greatful Dead covers/stories
Blast from the Past: Mark and Patrick@Rolly's (2010)
Links: Patrick Lawton, More Patrick Lawton Stories
Previous (Kathleen Edwards and Stan Rogers on CBC's Top Canadian Albums List) - - - Next (News Roundup w Ryan Van Sickle, James Gray, JJ Cale, Dave Rave)
I have absolutely fallen head-over-heels for a new TV series somebody's trying to crowd-fund called Jesus 2015. The plot is simple but wildly creative. A man is arrested for burglary. The police run a routine DNA check and discover that there is a "specific and positive match 99999.9" to the DNA on the shroud of Turin.
Now, I don't know about you, but I'm already hooked. There's no doubt this is Jesus: in fact, the lab has even increased the top limit on percentages because they're so positive. There's none of the wishy-washy 99.99% shit you see in paternity tests on Maury -- no, there ain't even a shadow of a doubt!
Plus, I'm entranced by the idea that the police have DNA from the shroud of Turin in their database. All too often I think they're incompetent, but it was definitely a good move to throw in Jesus. Some smart sergeant must have said, "Hey, nobody gets a free pass! Just because he's the Lamb of God doesn't mean he's never going to boost a car stereo in Santa Monica."
I bet they've even got dinosaur DNA in this database. Maybe in one episode we'll find out that Pontius Pilate has a 41937.71 chance of being a triceratops.
Maybe you noticed the odd religious figures/euphemisms in the police database. I got no explanation for that. Did they catch the Lamb of God smoking weed on Abbot Kinney Boulevard? Did the Bread of Life shoplift some earbuds from the Main Street Radio Shack?
But let's back up a little bit and merge the details offered in the trailer with this auteur's IndieGoGo beg:
A White Male Age 33 was arrested for 415, 459 (Burglary in Progress) and taken into custody by L.A.P.D on May, 13th 2013 in Venice California. The young man does not reveal his identity and is booked under the alias "Christian."
God, that's so L. A. I'll bet the dude who was arrested before him was given the alias "Flavio."
Chris Doe was booked and processed at The Pacific Station in Los Angeles, routine prints, DNA samples were collected from said individual.
I have to admit I'm a bit confused here. Forget the fact this isn't close to a sentence. Why is the phrase "from said individual" there? Because it's been fourteen words since the antecedent noun and dimmer readers might think we're talking about Kermit the Frog by this point? Did anybody suspect that sentence could end with "from Zsa Zsa Gabor!!!"?
A report from Aundergene Forensic DNA laboratories dated June,4 2013. The D.N.A. submitted from the arrest of Chris Doe Male Age 33 May 13th 2013 has specific and positive match 99999.9 to D.N.A. reserved in bank collected samples originating from The Shroud of Turin.
There's really no other explanation for this paragraph other than some police reports are automatically generated by the game of Boggle. In related news, Mike Smith Male Age 27 October 12th 2013 arrested also bank robbery hello 867-5309 fingerprints Robyn.
Now, here's where the plot runs into a fork in the road. The trailer says Chris was released from prison due to overcrowding, but the IndieGoGo summary is markedly more dramatic:
He is held at the West Pacific police station awaiting transport to the downtown courthouse. While being detained he is incarcerated with a Mexican gang known as the Disciples.
The cops always let Mexican gangs share a single cell because ay dios mio, they get lonely otherwise.
As the prisoners are being transported via the 405 freeway in Los Angeles, an accident with a tractor trailer occurs, killing several of the prisoners on the bus.
I pictured SNL's "The Californians" while reading this. They were being transported on the 405? That's important to know, because that kind of thing would never happen on the 101.
I think it's smart the writer decided Jesus wasn't released due to prison overcrowding. Because then all the religious conservatives would be saying, "Damn these lily-livered liberals, letting our Lord and Saviour out of the hoosegow!"
The surviving 13, including Christian, are able to escape in the chaos and confusion. Local and State Authorities as well as Leaders of Religious and the scientific communities despite massive efforts have been unable to locate Chris Doe for questioning.
Really? Leaders of the scientific community couldn't find him? Well, then, they might as well give up. If dudes who stare into test tubes and light bunsen burners can't find a dude, he just will not be found.
Anyway, by now I'm sure you're as hooked as I am. I can't wait for this to be made into a TV series, which is why I nearly donated a dollar to the IndieGoGo beg. I don't need any gifts in return: I just want somebody who understands punctuation to be hired in my name.
So please, be generous. I'm already on the edge of my seat. Will Our Lord ever be found? At least he'll be easy to spot.
All Units be on the Lookout for a White Male Age 33 Surfer Distance From Top of Hair to Bottom of Nose Three and One Half Feet adios Charo 3.1416.
(Via the divine Joe.My.God)
Sunday, 4 August 2013
Kathleen Edwards and Stan Rogers in Last Half of CBC's Top Canadian Albums List
The area was well represtented in the first half of CBC's top Canadian albums list. Now that the final half of the tally is complete, two more talented local musicians have been added.
21. Kathleen Edwards: Failer
Links: Kathleen Edwards, More Kathleen Edwards Stories, Video courtesy of baer157
31. Stan Rogers: Fogarty's Cove
Links: Stan Rogers, More Stan Rogers Stories, Video courtesy of NovaScotian1992
On top of this, a number of musicians from our region made comments on other albums from the list.
Ben Caplan on Stan Rogers: Fogerty's Cove (21)
Luke Doucet (Whitehorse) on Sarah McLachlan: Fumbling Towards Ecstacy (20)
Kathleen Edwards on Blue Rodeo: Five Days in July (15)
Sarah Harmer on Tragically Hip: Fully Completely (13)
Links: Numbers 40-21 on the list, Numbers 20-1 on the List, The Complete List, More CBC Lists
Blast from the Past: Kathleen Edwards and Stan Rogers on Top Canadian Singers List
Previous (New Paul Federici CD) - - - Next (Patrick Lawton & Mark Vanderheyden@Rolly's)
Saturday, 3 August 2013
New Paul Federici CD: Now and Then . . .
Layered vocals and beautiful harmonies bring out Paul's soft, moving voice. Everything is enhanced by touches of cello, mandolin, piano, pedal steel and more.
This is courtesy of the artist's musical cohorts, Leon Furs (multiple instruments), Kirk Starkey (cello), Adam Warner (drums), Mike Vial (guitar), and Nick Skalkos (drums)
This wonderful album is available as a physical CD and download through his Bandcamp page and can also be downloaded through iTunes.
Below are two videos from the album courtesy of Paul's YouTube page.
Links: Paul Federici, More CD Releases
Previous (News Roundup w Interviews and vids by Dave Battrick, Troy Harmer and Sam Turton) - - - Next (Kathleen Edwards and Stan Rogers on CBC's Top Canadian Albums List)